Attorney General Monitoring Tribune

In January, the Columbia Journalism Review urged Tribune to get out of the newspaper business because its newspapers "aren't doing much public good." Now the Illinois Attorney General is monitoring the McCormick-Tribune Foundation because of worries that Tribune executives may be compromising the foundation's obligation to the public good.

In both cases, major watchdog institutions cast doubt upon Tribune's fidelity to its public obligations, and in both cases the Chicago Tribune has withheld these facts from the public by ignoring the story. What does that tell you about the newspaper's devotion to the public good?

The latest revelations appeared in the March 5 issue of Crain's Chicago Business. We won't repeat all the details here, since they are so cogently presented there, but here's a quick summary:

The McCormick-Tribune Foundation invests its assets almost entirely in Tribune stock, making it Tribune's second largest shareholder, which lets Tribune executives wave it around as a major chip in battles with the Chandler family and other parties. But because the foundation is invested almost entirely in Tribune stock, it is overexposed to the fortunes of that stock. The foundation lost about half of its value, about $1 billion, from 2003-2005, according to Crain's. During the same period, the S&P 500 Index rose about 13 percent. According to Crain's:

Foundations with more diversified investments have fared much better. For example, the Chicago-based John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation's assets climbed by nearly $1 billion during the two-year period ended in 2005 when McCormick's were declining by nearly $1 billion. The MacArthur Foundation posted an 18% investment return last year, boosting its assets to more than $6 billion.

As the McCormick-Tribune's fortunes have dwindled, so have its charitable contributions. So as Tribune stock declines, Chicago suffers, too. And that's just fine, apparently, with Tribune.

Notice the pattern: the foundation takes the shape of a charity but violates the best practices of charities to promote the financial agenda of the Tribune Company. The Chicago Tribune takes the appearance of a newspaper but violates the best practices of American newspapers to promote the financial agenda of the Tribune Company.

This is what we mean when we say Cubune: Whether it adopts the shape of a newspaper, a television station, a radio station, a magazine, a charity, a baseball team, Tribune acts in its own self interest — public good, public trust, and ethics be damned.

The Attorney General's Office is confirming what we wrote in January.

More Cracks in the Death Star

The Tribune likes hats. Sometimes they wear a felt cap with a press card in the band and pretend to be reporters, sometimes they don a Cubs ballcap and act like sports-action figures (who always lose), and sometimes they don the top hat of the man about town and flash some coin. And then, when you point to something dubious that they're doing, they will say, "That wasn't me, that was the guy in the other hat. Can't you see that we're completely different people?"

Um, no, you're not. And even when you say you are, sometimes you have more than one hat on your cabeza. Sometimes you're wearing the whole hat rack.

Anyway, this post concerns the McCormick Tribune Foundation (Top Hat), which claims to be a charity founded by Col. Robert McCormick, the white-collar criminal who first figured out that you can make a lot of money by disguising self-promotion as journalism. And by disguising self-promotion as charity, too.

The McCormick-Tribune Foundation wears the top hat of the well-heeled philanthropist but mostly busies itself buying up chunks of Chicago and branding its name on them. Thus, we have:

The McCormick Tribune Printers Row Book Fair
The McCormick Tribune Campus Center
The McCormick Tribune Plaza
The McCormick Tribune Center
The McCormick Tribune Ice Rink
The McCormick Tribune Emergency Room
The McCormick Tribune Center for Early Childhood Leadership
The McCormick Tribune Fellowship (which produces McCormick Tribune Fellows)
The McCormick Tribune Bridgehouse and Chicago River Museum
The McCormick Tribune Freedom Museum (how about some freedom from McCormick-Tribune?)
And just as soon as our greed gets the best of us, the McCormick Tribune Chicago Cubune Watch.

Who was it who said, to give is good, to give anonymously is better?

Back to our story.... The McCormick Tribune Foundation (Top Hat) is reconsidering its investment in the Tribune Company (Hat Rack). Because it values clarity so much, the Tribune Company sometimes calls itself the Tribune Corporation and other times, just Tribune. So we'll go with Hat Rack for now.

About 75 percent of Top Hat's money is invested in Hat Rack, which makes Top Hat the holder of 13 percent of Hat Rack. The problem is, Hat Rack's stock is going in the toilet, where Top Hat prefers not to venture. So Top Hat hired some suits to study whether it can get away from Hat Rack.

I know this is confusing, so just to restate: McCormick Tribune is considering a divorce from Tribune.

At least, that's what they say. Knowing Col. McCormick as we do, we suspect that he may have a fifth ace up his sleeve. The present crisis was precipitated by the Chandler Family of Los Angeles, which owns 20 percent of the Hat Rack. We think Top Hat might actually be planning to leverage its 13 percent to confront the Chandler shakeup with its own takeover of the whole Hat Rack.

Then what happens? Tribune has just bought Tribune, essentially. Nothing happens. Top Hat rehires the current regime of incompetents [E&P membership required], keeps the Cubs, keeps all the TV and radio stations, keeps the bias, and anyone who cares about truth and justice can just go to hell.

Now that's charity for ya.