What's Wrong with this Picture?

This photo was taken from the Cubs rally in Daley Plaza on Monday, and why are these guys wearing business suits? Is this a Cubs rally or the Enron trial? There was only one guy on stage in a baseball uniform, and you can see him here to the right, picking his nose. I think that's Billy Williams. These other guys look like the Bored of Directors. There are four suits in this picture, for a total of about $8,000 at Saks, but you can't see the biggest suit of all — Dennis Fitzsimmons, the CEO — because he's hiding directly behind the guy at the lecturn, probably so no Cub fan can get a good shot at him. Dennis has the snazziest suit of the bunch, but if you ask me, any guy who can't loosen his tie at a baseball rally is no freer than a slave. But back to fashion: They couldn't even find a Cubs cap to cover those balding white pates? Didn't they have to pass the Tribune Store to get out of the Tribune Tower? Couldn't they be bothered to stop and load up on blue pajamas? Or do they just sell that crap to the suckers who made them rich? The suckers in the audience.


Seriously, there was only one suit on stage at the White Sox rally in '05 and that was the suit worn by His Honor da Mare. As it should be. That's why even this year, We are Chicago baseball. The Cubs are nothing but an elaborate white-collar crime. The Cubs are slumping into the playoffs (to use the Tribune's own words) like sub-prime loans slumping into the lending market.

And we'll root root root for the Assets, if they don't win it's a shame...